The 10 Most Important Lessons from The Princess Bride

The 10 Most Important Lessons from The Princess Bride


The Princess Bride is my favourite movie of all time. Followed closely by Dodgeball so you know I have good taste in films. As an aficionado of the PB I have learned many life lessons and I wanted to share them with you because, as you wish. OK, maybe you didn’t wish for it, but it is an iconic line and I had to fit it in somewhere to prove my worth on the subject.

  1. 6-fingered men are crooks and cowards. This is for all the single ladies out there. If you see an extra digit, do not, I repeat, do not think about the benefits of having more hands (I’ll leave that one to your imagination). Instead, remember that a 6-fingered man will run away at confrontation, steal your sword, slice you in half with it and intimidate small children on his way out. Stay Away!
  2. If you wear a mask, your tru wuv will not recognize you. This can be a great party trick, bedtime trick or spying trick. Make sure you wear all black too as it really completes the look.
  3. A little bit of deadly poison is OK. If you want to impress your friends, start taking just a little bit* of deadly poison. Increase the amounts slowly over time and then pound some down at a frat party. Instant winner. *Warning: defining ‘a little bit’ is tricky. Might have to be trial and error.
  4. If you ever find yourself in a fire swamp, bring a sword. I think this is good overall advice for any confined space with aggressive animals inside. Zoos come to mind. So what I am really saying is bring a sword to the zoo.
  5. You should always wait before swimming after eating (miracle pill or otherwise). This is good solid advice that your grandmother likely imparted when you were scarfing down your sandwich as you were running toward the lake. Then when you had a cramp, you blamed your brother. Or, maybe that was just me.
  6. Mean it and peanut rhyme. If your fledgling poetry career needed some inspiration, you are welcome.
  7. Always start a fight with your non-dominant hand. This gives the person you are fighting a fighting chance and then you pull the switcharoo and bingo-bango you are golden in the fight department. (That sentence was all kind of fun, right?!)
  8. If you are going to settle for a man you don’t love, choosing a Prince might seem like a good idea, but it’s not. I can’t stress this enough. Check on your Prince’s credentials before agreeing to mawy him. Ask yourself ‘Could he be using me to start a war with Gilder?’ if the answer is even maybe, go find a farmboy.
  9. The definition of inconceivable: “not capable of being imagined or grasped mentally; unbelievable.” Trust me, you need to know this.
  10. When climbing the Cliffs of Insanity, it is helpful to bring a friend and a rope. The friend can either carry you up if your friend is the size of Andre the Giant (RIP) or throw it down to you from the top. Either way, good to have a friend with you. If you fall, they can recover the body and notify next of kin. Next lifetime, I will start a travel blog with this kind of gold.

If you haven’t yet seen the movie, I implore you to watch it. It is great for the whole family and there have to be thousands of other important lessons to learn. I will go watch it again, just in case.


  1. Best movie experience ever: a couple of friends showed up at my house unexpectedly and said, “We’re going to see a movie, wanna come?” Why’d they even think they needed to ask? I’d never heard of the movie and had no idea what to expect. Was it horror? Drama? Comedy?
    The movie was “The Princess Bride”. I’ve learned from that experience that the less I know about a movie going in the more I enjoy it, even though I’ve now seen “The Princess Bride” at least a hundred times and I swear every time I enjoy it just as much as that first time.
    Where I work different departments used to do Halloween themes. It’s a source of longstanding disappointment to me that I’ve never been able to convince my department to do a Princess Bride theme. Maybe one of these years I’ll just dress up as Miracle Max for my own enjoyment. And if anyone complains I’ll just ask, “Why don’t you just give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice in it?”
    Christopher recently posted…Planets Will Guide The Peace.My Profile

  2. I love that movie – and all of the catch phrases that go along with it: “Inconceivable!” “Have fun storming the castle!” “Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday “, “My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father – prepare to die!” “As you wish.” They are all things that you can say to just about anyone and they immediately know what you are talking about.
    Jana recently posted…Ten Reasons To Think Twice before Using a Hickey ExcuseMy Profile

    • So many iconic lines! I quote that movie all the time just to see who is ‘in the know’. Can there be any better movie than one with a Prince Humperdink? I think not.
      “Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you in the morning.”
      That might have sounded bad… but I say that with “the utmost respect” (wink)

  3. Love that movie. Have seen it several times over the years. Shawn Wallace just showed up on “Mozart in the Jungle” and every time I see him my head goes “INCONCEIVABLE” without my permission.

    Great list!
    Cassandra recently posted…Still CassandraMy Profile

  4. I must admit shame-faced that I haven’t seen the movie yet, although I’m bound to one of these days. I still enjoyed the lessons, though — especially the third one. May require a bit of trial and error? Haha! Absolutely!

  5. 11. There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. So always remember to keep the girls away from sharp objects.
    Spoken Like A True Nut recently posted…16 things that still suck in 2016.My Profile

  6. I saw the “Princess Bride” in the theater when it came out, not once, but TWICE and have seen it a gazillion times since then. I can’t tell you how happy I was when my (then 7yo) son watched the movie for the first time and loved it (erasing any doubts that I might have brought the wrong kind home from the hospital). If I’m scrolling through the channels and see it on, I always have to stop and watch it a little bit. It truly does teach a lot of life lessons (in addition to being entertaining)– thanks for pointing out that fact in this post.
    Gina W. recently posted…In a Russian State of Mind…My Profile

  7. […] I will leave you with these. You really get a sense of how fun-loving and easy going our Justin is. Will you be a Belieber with me? I dare you to watch these and still think he’s a tool. Inconceivable! […]

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