Apologies I Am Owed for Last Week
My family is not unlike any other family. Mums get the short end of the stick sometimes. I wanted to document last week’s apologies owed. See if this rings true for you too:
I am sorry I scared the crap out of you in the dark when you didn’t know I was there.
I am sorry I barked incessantly when you were on the phone.
I am sorry I left my socks on the living room floor.
I am sorry that I put every fucking t-shirt I own into the laundry because I didn’t want to hang them up.
I am sorry I didn’t clean up after myself even though you asked me three times.
I am sorry you did 6 loads of laundry and I didn’t offer to help, but I still demanded to know why my pants weren’t clean.
I am sorry I rolled my eyes at you when you were singing in the kitchen.
I am sorry I stepped on your broken foot twice.
I am sorry I woke you up to play tug when you were napping on the couch.
I am sorry you had to stop doing what you were doing to find the paper towel that is in the same place it always is.
I am sorry I disturbed you when you were in the washroom to ask about a play date.
I am sorry I offered you to drive everyone without checking if you could do it first.
I am sorry I forgot to use my manners.
I am sorry I used your toothbrush even though it was clearly labelled.
I’m guessing it was the dog who barked and wanted to play tug but you just never know…
Let’s see, I’ll take the socks one, most of the laundry ones, and the manners one. There you have it, that was my weekend.
It was the dog. He is generally lazy except when I want to be lazy. Kind of like a fetus. Was that too much?
That sounds like a pretty typical day in the life of a mother. When they get older, they get no better at “sorry”, but at least they get better at “thank you”.
But do they get better at putting dirty socks away?!
OMG! Why do they always step on the bad foot?! They do. It’s like a homing device. Got a bunion? Step on that mother-effer! Broken bone? Don’t forget to stomp on it. I feel your pain. Literally.
Agreed!
Bruises on the thighs? No problem, that is what elbows are for. Stomach troubles? That is where the baseball is aimed. Stuffy nose? ‘Mom, is this sock dirty?’. An endless list really…
Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my iPad
and tested to see if it can survive a thirty foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now broken and she has 83 views.
I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it
with someone!
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