Men are Like Cats, Not Dogs (a Scientific Study by Me)

Men are Like Cats, Not Dogs (a Scientific Study by Me)

I have been doing some thinking about the common association that women are more like cats and men are more like dogs. I would like to refute that. Men are like cats and I can prove it. Be warned the following contains VAST generalizations and a bit of tongue in cheek. You are meant to nod along and maybe even chuckle or, if I do a good job, guffaw. There was no science harmed in the making of this blog post.

Why Men are Like Cats

  1. Cats try stupid stunts thinking they are invincible. Men and boys are constantly getting into trouble sliding serving trays down hills is a current example. 

    men like cats

    I can totally make it.

  2. Cats are curious. Have you seen a man drive by the scene of an accident and NOT slow down to look?
  3. Cats like to mark with urine to leave messages for other cats. Messages like ‘they are totally cool for mating’. When a man whips it out in public, it is generally assumed they are ready for a mating.
  4. If you don’t feed cats they get aggressive. Think about a room full of pizza and a man fasting for blood work.
  5. Cats are socialized when they are 4-12 weeks old and it defines what type of cat they will be around others. Men were socialized around the same time and never change either.
  6. Cats are not afraid to bitch slap a friend if they are out of line. Men will get that over with then share a beer while women would much rather hold a grudge.

    men like cats

    Take THAT for putting me in a stupid pink stroller.

  7. Cats lick themselves. Men would love to lick themselves.
  8. Cats don’t rely on their sense of smell. Have you smelled any teenage boys’ rooms lately? They don’t rely on their sense of smell either.
  9. Cats like to knead things. Boobs.
  10. Cats have very sensitive hearing even more so than dogs. Men can also hear everything you say, they just choose which items they will acknowledge.
  11. Cats lose almost as much fluid in saliva as they do through peeing. So cats drool a lot. Hmmm. 

    men like cats

    What? Is there a little something there?

  12. Cat urine glows under black light. That was urine in the bed, right?
  13. Finally, a cat’s brain is more similar to a man’s brain than that of a dog’s. It’s on the web y’all.

 

I rest my case.

Mister did not approve this message. Meow.

men like cats

Point proven.


Comments

  1. your brain works in mysterious ways…

  2. Personally, I think you should get a scholarship to continue this informative study – While it is all true, without it being printed in the Journal of Male Affectations, no one will give it the honor it deserves. Mister is biased and shouldn’t be given the right to vote.

  3. You’re right, the similarities are striking.

    Especially the annoying way they’ll go right ahead and lie across your keyboard when you’re trying to write because apparently you’re not paying enough attention to them; I just hate it when my husband does that.
    Spoken Like A True Nut recently posted…NanoPoblano, Day 30: Where Fifty gets his Shades, maybe.My Profile

  4. Well if it’s on the internet or Kristine says it, then it must be true. That is all.
    kdcol recently posted…A step behindMy Profile

  5. As much as I my Y chromosome wants to object I can’t deny the evidence and have to say guilty as charged. I even thought of another example: if you ask a dog to do something it does it. If you ask a cat to do something it ignores you. Not that I’m ever like that. Anyway it should be noted that cats are loners while dogs are pack animals, and we guys do like to hang out in groups, but that single counter-example isn’t enough to undermine your thesis.

    Hey, I just heard my wife taking out the garbage. She asked me to do it just seven or eight hours ago, but I was busy trying to untangle this ball of string.
    Christopher recently posted…Beneath The Bough Of Mistletoe. (Repost.)My Profile

  6. Yes, you make a lot of good points Kristine. I agree with the suggestion that you should apply for a grant for further study*.
    (*spend all the money on an all-expense paid booze cruise for all your blogger friends).
    Gina W. recently posted…“Do Butterflies Fart?”My Profile

  7. I have a cat and a husband that would totally prove your theory. You can borrow them for further study if you’d like.
    Sandra recently posted…Bipolar Blogging RightsMy Profile

  8. Well that actually makes sense since my cat is psychotic. Thanks for all the gifs by the way – I see a future for you in You Tube!
    eva recently posted…I Have Been Cheating On YouMy Profile

  9. I should really be offended by these sweeping generalizations and the fluorescent pee, but then I was distracted by a bit of yarn and forgot about it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge

%d bloggers like this: