From the Words of the Great Kanye West, Come the Words of the Great Kayne West

Kayne West recently appeared on the Ellen show and said the following words of wisdom:

Picasso is dead. Steve Jobs is dead. Walt Disney is dead. Name somebody living that you can name in the same breath as them?

Kayne’s quotes are always inspirational, so I thought I would share his nuggets of gold with my fan(s). Italics are what I think are implied by Kanye’s remarks. Everything else is a direct quote. No shit. Direct quotes (#14 y’all. I feel him!). Enjoy!

1. Don’t tell me about being likable. You don’t think that I would be one of the characters of today’s modern Bible? The media crucify me like they did Christ. Jesus is dead. Moses is dead. Noah is dead. Wait? Is Jesus still dead?
2. I’m doing pretty good as far as geniuses go … I’m like a machine. Einstein is dead. Sigmund Freud is dead. Isaac Newton is dead because the apple killed him. Not the Steve Jobs Apple, because Steve Jobs is dead.
3. Visiting my mind is like visiting the Hermès factory.  Hermès is dead. Oh my God, Hermès is dead! Can I still get Hermès soap if Hermès is dead? I like saying Hermès because it makes me look smart.
4. Nothing in life is promised except death. Robin Williams is dead. Joan Rivers is dead. Chris Farley is dead. I promise. This ain’t no joke.
5. We are in a Renessaince period. Donatello is dead. da Vinci is dead. Botticelli is dead. Did I mention the thing about Picasso?
6. I am an artist. I have a condition called synaesthesia where I see sounds. The Zeusaphone is dead. The glass armonica is dead. The tissue box guitar I made for Kim is dead.
7. I walk through the hotel and I walk down the street and people look at me like I’m fucking insane, like I’m Hitler. Hitler is dead. Stalin is dead. Mussolini is dead. I’m told that’s all good.
8. I am the number one human being in music. That means any person that’s living or breathing is number two.  Michael Jackson is dead. Prince is dead. I’m going down as a legend, whether or not you like me or not. I am the new Jim Morrison and Jim Morrison is dead. I am the new Kurt Cobain and Kurt Cobain is dead.
9. Sometimes people write novels and they just be so wordy and so self-absorbed. Shakespeare is dead. Charles Dickens is dead. Mark Twain is dead. But that is okay because I am a proud nonreader of books.
10. I’m like a tree. I feed the branches of the people. That flower I got for my birthday is dead. That elm on the corner with the bugs in it is dead. The plant the slug chewed is dead.
11. Despite what Kim says, I don’t need a Board of Directors for my social media. Myspace is dead. Google Plus is dead. Digg is dead.
12. Please, corporations. Can you please support me, please? Just for 3 million dollars. I need it so bad. I need a new pool in my backyard. The filter is dead. The heater is dead. The squirrel floating in the hot tub is dead.
13. I feel like the type of girl I would be with is a fellow superhero. So we get that ‘already flying and now we’re just flying together’ thing. The Flash is dead. Captain America is dead. Spiderman is dead. Sorry, spoiler alert.
14. Sometimes I get emotional over fonts. Nobody appreciates Times New Roman, Helvetica or even Brush Script anymore. It is like they are dead. Sorry, I need a minute.
15. When I think of competition it’s like I try to create against the past. I think about Michelangelo and Picasso, you know, the pyramids. There are a lot of dead people in the pyramids but they are almost like they are not dead because you can still visit them and not in the gravestone kind of way. Did I mention Picasso being dead because he is, you know?
16. My greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.  Maybe I’ll see myself perform dead.

It ain’t no joke.

I’m sorry for the realness.

Kayne out.

http://www.ellentv.com/videos/0-u3mktrdh/

 

Photo credit: Peter Hutchins. Kanye West @ Verizon Center, Washington, DC, on Thursday, November 21, 2013.